What happens next?

After my Dad died, on December the 24th 2006, my life has changed dramatically.

From that day on I had no parents to look after me anymore. Never again could I visit them and ask my Mom what she was cooking or looking into my Dad's eyes saying -I know what you mean Dad-.

It is just bitter to lose parents in such a short time...it should be forbidden ;)

On the other hand I am optimistic enough to realise that both my parents have experienced and seen too much in their early lifes. Both lifes wore scars and signs from the war in Indonesia. When both of them died, the war inside came to a dead silence as well...

I wonder how close Mom and Dad are in my present life...can they see my struggle and grieve of missing them in my life?

I miss you loads, Mom...Dad!